What I think about in the shower.

(The longer you flow, the more lost you'll get. It's important to remember how long you’ve had to explore and that most times it’s easyer to work than to work for something you’re not wanting.)

Finding that reason to keep going. That’s what drives me. I’m positively parabolic and there is few things that I can take. What I leave is only up to me and no longer her.

 

It’s alright to laugh, I think it’s funny too! (0:

I also figured out I’m a SMRT know it all, but who hasn’t?

Smile, it’s only beginning.

I always feel I have to spit one out every time I'm in a new computer lab.
This time I feel the review of the computer is in order.

These machines are probably about 3yrs years old. But the university spent good money on the good machine so the desks look appropriate and proportionate.

I'm here with Jaime, and everything is swell.

To agree or to disagree.

Something inspirational is going to strike me. To write. I thought I had something, but it left. It's amazing how the universe makes sense even in loss and pain. I feel I have wallowed in this goop too long. But for me to realize the dream, I have to know if a key part of me will be coming along for the ride.

Yes, no. That's all it's going to take. It's going to be fine either way. I am ready mentally. But I want this to be for keeps. I'll regret it if I never say it.

Ask her.

I'm giving myself a month. A month of preparation, extraordinary revelation, and exclamatory motivation. Because, THE TIME IS NOW... marge. LOL!

 

[Accompanying this to be a picture of a lame letter I wrote. But the sars aligned and both of the pictures I took were corrupt when I transfered them over. So I took it as a sign. Hopefully after my emotional relapse after next month, I will put it up.]

My scenes have been striped.

For some reason I always write a New Years Post. This is it. Last year it almost seemed robotic. Last year sucked. Last year was the worst, but at the same time the best. There is nothing like last year. That's why we remember them in years and years to pass.

Now, what to do to make this year as bad ass as last year. I can think of one thing, get rid of all of the BS.[That sounds a little, "life coach-ish]

Well, some BS is needed, I wouldn't have learned so much without it. So, I'll just alter the BS in my life. The important BS. But, much of it, I need to get rid of. A good 80% is not good...

So here I write about..

The BS you should keep is yours. And for whatever reason, you know it's bad, but something inside of you tells you, "Come on, you know you like it." That's the value of it, to give you cheap thrills.

These cheap thrills, they're different for everyone. For some it's drinking, others get their kicks from feeling powerful; some people just find that thinking they're a little higher than thy neighbor, can mean cheap thrills. But those thrills, it's nothing compared to that thrill that keeps you living. Whatever is important to you should give you that thrill, and then some...

So that's what I need. My cheap thrill and less BS.

The BS I need to get rid of, can easily be taken care of, but it takes time and I'm impatient. At least that's what it will teach me.

I still need to learn that. That's what I want to achieve. Patience. I need it, but I can currently get it during a big project. This time my project will be myself. I will thank me later.

Right now I just want to knock out.

 

Merry new year and to all a good year.